“I Have So Much to Do!” (A Lesson on Busyness)

“Remind me again WHY I decided to write a book (and edit another writer’s manuscript as well), help my daughter prepare for a missions trip to a foreign country, buy a house, and sell a house all in six months…”

This is an excerpt from an actual text I sent out to a friend several weeks ago. Today, I reread that text and shook my head in bewilderment.

Why Do I Do This to Myself?

It’s like I think, “Hmm, I’m logging in eight hours of sleep every night, my client work is completed, chores are caught up, and I’m five chapters ahead of schedule on writing my manuscript. What a slacker—you need more things to do, Regina.”

For some illogical reason, we tend to think that we might lose our place as Mother-Wife-Employee-Friend of the Year if we aren’t constantly running a marathon of “to-do’s.” We believe that if we don’t bear telltale dark circles under our eyes or exist on meals consisting of granola bars dug out of our purse, we must not be pulling our share of the work.

Competing With OthersWhy do we feel the need to compete with others by complaining about the 100+ things we have to do and moaning, “I’m so busy that I hardly have time to take a shower?” We imagine that they will somehow be impressed. That we’ve trumped everyone else’s exhausting list of things to accomplish.

I try not to be the dreaded complainer in a group, but I have those moments of weakness when I spew out all my woes and sit back waiting for an “atta boy” (girl?). Seems a little childish, right?

Exactly.

It’s My Own Fault

If I can be transparent here—I do it to myself. It appears that my objective is to be a glutton for punishment. Here’s the thing: There’s no bomb strapped to my back set to explode if I don’t register for at least two college classes while simultaneously facilitating a middle school yearbook class and editing a 60,000-word manuscript for a client. As a self-inflicted martyr, I choose to do most of these tasks.

Too Busy for Others

When we are running the gamut of busyness, we are really acting a bit selfish. “How is that?” you ask. If you feel exhausted with all the things you are rushing around doing, it’s a good bet that you aren’t spending quality time with others (That includes devotion time with God…). I won’t go down that rabbit trail here, but you can read more about my thoughts on that in my blog post, Are You Even Listening?So, when you see me next time, do me a favor…

Take my hands in yours, look straight into my eyes, and repeat these words, “Regina, I don’t feel one ounce sorry for you no matter how much complaining you do. If you want to burn the candle at both ends and turn gray-headed with high blood pressure while the rest of us enjoy vacations and dates out with our spouses, you go right ahead, honey.”

I hope I listen. That I ask you to invite me over for dinner, plan a coffee date with you, and ask you for vacation recommendations.

I hope I say, “Thank you. I needed that.”

And, I hope you’ve read this blog post and learned a valuable lesson about letting go of unnecessary busyness. Remind yourself that busyness does not always parallel productiveness or success.

Now…go find a hammock anchored between two trees and do nothing for a few hours.

You’re welcome. 🙂

Regina

P.S. Need more convincing? Check out this blog post by Scott Dannemiller entitled, “Busy is a Sickness.“